If you have ever told someone you are considering homeschooling — or that you homeschool your child — you have almost certainly heard the question.
It comes quickly. Sometimes with genuine concern. Sometimes with a hint of judgment. Almost always with certainty:
“But what about socialisation?”
It is the single most common objection to homeschooling. And it is worth taking seriously — because the concern behind it is real. Children do need to learn how to interact with others, how to navigate disagreement, how to build friendships, how to function in groups.
The question is not whether socialisation matters. Of course it does.
The question is whether a classroom is the only place — or even the best place — where genuine socialisation happens.
Research has spent decades answering that question. And the answer is more surprising than most people expect.
What the Research Actually Found
Let us go directly to the evidence — because this is where the conversation usually fails to go.
Studies demonstrate that homeschooled students are well socialised. Several studies found no significant difference in the social skills of homeschooled and non-homeschooled students. Other studies found that homeschooled children score significantly higher on social development rating scales. One study using the Vineland Adaptive Behavior Scale found that homeschooled students substantially outperformed traditionally schooled students — with average scores at the 84th percentile compared to the 23rd percentile for traditionally schooled students across communication, daily living skills, socialisation, and social maturity.
The National Home Education Research Institute reports that 64% of peer-reviewed studies on social and emotional development show homeschooled students performing statistically better than conventionally schooled peers. A Harvard Human Flourishing study of over 12,000 participants found homeschooled children were 33% more likely to volunteer in adulthood.
Research suggests that homeschooled children have higher quality friendships and better relationships with their parents and other adults. They are happy, optimistic, and satisfied with their lives. Their moral reasoning is at least as advanced as that of other children, and they may be more likely to act unselfishly. As adolescents, they have a strong sense of social responsibility and exhibit less emotional turmoil and problem behaviours than their peers.
The research is clear. The concern is understandable. But the facts do not support it.
What “Socialisation” Actually Means
Here is the question that the “but what about socialisation?” objection rarely stops to ask:
What does socialisation actually mean?
If it means sitting in a room with thirty same-age children for six hours a day — then yes, homeschooled children get less of that.
But if socialisation means learning to:
- Communicate respectfully with people of different ages and backgrounds
- Build genuine, lasting friendships
- Develop empathy and moral reasoning
- Contribute to a community
- Navigate conflict with maturity
Then research suggests homeschooled children are not disadvantaged. In many measures, they are ahead.
The classroom is one social environment. It is not the only one. And it is not always the best one.
A child who learns to interact only with same-age peers — in a competitive, hierarchical environment where bullying is common and comparison is constant — is not necessarily better socialised than a child who interacts with a diverse community of people across ages, interests, and backgrounds.
What Happens in a Classroom — The Honest Picture
The “socialisation” concern assumes that what happens in a traditional school environment is uniformly positive social development.
But research tells a more complicated story.
We explored this in detail in our earlier blog on bullying and classroom shame — but the numbers bear repeating here:
A 2019 UNESCO report found bullying prevalence ranging from 30.3% to 48.2% globally. Nearly half of all children in school environments experience bullying.
The child who is bullied daily — who dreads Monday mornings, who eats lunch alone, who has learned that participation leads to mockery — is not receiving positive socialisation. They are receiving something that research documents as genuinely damaging to their social development.
Socialisation is not neutral. The quality of the social environment matters enormously.
And a homeschooled child who is intentionally connected to a warm, diverse community — through sports, religious organisations, neighbourhood activities, family gatherings, and family games like charades — may be receiving richer, more genuine social development than a child who spends eight hours a day in an environment where comparison and hierarchy are the dominant social dynamics.
What Homeschooling Parents Actually Do
Dr. Richard Medlin, Professor of Psychology at Stetson University and a leading researcher on homeschool socialisation, states: “The research indicates that homeschooling parents expect their children to respect and get along with people of diverse backgrounds, provide their children with a variety of social opportunities outside the family.”
This is the reality that the “but socialisation” question misses:
Homeschooling parents are not keeping their children at home in isolation. They are actively building diverse, rich social lives for their children — outside the classroom.
Practical socialisation in homeschooling families looks like:
- 🕌 Religious community — mosque, Islamic classes, community events
- 🏃 Sports and activities — team sports, swimming, martial arts
- 👨👩👧 Family gatherings — cousins, extended family, neighbours
- 🌍 Community involvement — volunteering, local events
- 📚 Homeschool cooperatives — groups of homeschooling families learning together
- 🎭 Family games — charades, board games, activities that build real communication
The difference is not the quantity of social interaction. It is the quality.
The Real Socialisation Question
Here is the question that parents — whether they homeschool or not — should be asking:
Not “is my child spending enough time with other children?”
But: “What is my child learning from the social environments they are in?”
Are they learning that their voice matters? That disagreement can be respectful? That people of different ages and backgrounds deserve consideration? That friendship is built on genuine connection rather than proximity?
Or are they learning to navigate hierarchy and comparison? To perform rather than connect? To survive rather than flourish?
The goal of socialisation is not the production of a child who can function in a group. It is the development of a person who can relate genuinely to other human beings.
And research consistently shows that this kind of person — empathetic, socially responsible, genuinely connected — is as likely to emerge from a thoughtfully managed homeschooling environment as from a traditional school.
How Charades Builds Genuine Social Skills
This is exactly where Charades4Kids contributes something real.
In twenty minutes of charades, a child practises — naturally, joyfully, without pressure — every social skill that genuine socialisation requires:
- 🗣️ Communication — expressing clearly, adapting when misunderstood
- 👂 Active listening — paying genuine attention to others
- 🤝 Cooperation — working as a team toward a shared goal
- 😊 Empathy — reading others’ expressions, understanding their perspective
- 🎭 Turn-taking — patience, respect for others’ participation
- 😂 Navigating failure — losing with grace, supporting others through theirs
These are not classroom skills. They are life skills.
And they are built — in a homeschooling family or any family — in the ordinary, warm, laughing moments of genuine family play.
A Final Word — To Every Parent Who Has Been Asked “But What About Socialisation?”
The next time someone asks you that question — you can answer honestly:
Research shows that homeschooled children are well socialised. That they have high quality friendships. That they are more likely to volunteer in adulthood. That they show lower rates of anxiety and depression. That they are — by every measure research has applied so far — functioning well socially.
And then you can ask the question that the research invites:
“What kind of socialisation are we actually talking about?”
Because the goal was never to produce a child who can survive a classroom.
The goal is to raise a human being who can genuinely connect with other human beings — with warmth, with respect, with curiosity, and with care.
That kind of person is built at home. In families. In communities. In the ordinary evenings of genuine connection.
And yes — in a game of charades.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do homeschooled children develop good social skills?
Yes. Research consistently shows that homeschooled children develop strong social skills. One study found homeschooled students scored at the 84th percentile on social maturity compared to the 23rd percentile for traditionally schooled peers. The National Home Education Research Institute reports that 64% of peer-reviewed studies show homeschooled students performing better than conventionally schooled peers on social and emotional development measures.
Is socialisation a valid concern for homeschooling families?
It is a valid question — but research does not support it as a valid concern when homeschooling is done intentionally. The concern assumes that classroom environments provide uniformly positive social development. Research shows a more complex picture — including high rates of bullying in traditional school environments — and consistently finds that intentionally homeschooled children develop strong social skills through diverse community involvement.
How do homeschooled children socialise?
Through sports teams, religious communities, neighbourhood activities, extended family, homeschool cooperatives, volunteering, and family-based activities. Research shows that homeschooling parents actively provide diverse social opportunities for their children — and that the resulting social development is strong across multiple measures.
What is the difference between classroom socialisation and genuine socialisation?
Classroom socialisation primarily involves interaction with same-age peers in a competitive, hierarchical environment. Genuine socialisation — the development of empathy, respectful communication, moral reasoning, and the ability to connect across ages and backgrounds — is built through diverse, warm, intentional community involvement. Research suggests homeschooled children often experience richer genuine socialisation than their traditionally schooled peers.
How does charades support social development in homeschooled children?
Charades builds every core social skill — communication, active listening, cooperation, empathy, turn-taking, and graceful failure — through joyful, pressure-free family play. For homeschooling families, it provides a consistent, engaging social activity that develops genuine social competence in the warmth of the home environment.